The Model

Self Coaching Model

The Model is the way we solve any problem in our lives. It shows us that no matter what the circumstance, we have the ability to look at it and believe anything we want. 

This is so empowering because we determine the outcome of our dreams by deciding what we want, and nurturing the attitudes and feelings that provide the catalyst for behavior.

When Victor Frankl was in a concentration camp, he noticed that there were kind and cruel prisoners and kind and cruel guards. The circumstances didn’t determine the results of how they showed up in the world and connected with others. 

Their beliefs about their circumstances were the key to whether they had fear or hope, and whether they treated each other with respect or with brutality, whether or not they were in charge, or they were ordered around.

Most people set a goal and focus on behaviors they determine will help them achieve their desires. When we focus on behavior, we’re likely to call upon willpower and motivation to produce the drive for our actions. 

But those fatigue in short order, leaving a person to gut it out in misery, trying to force their will to survive the struggle.

When we focus on our thoughts, we create emotions that drive our actions. Emotions of excitement, curiosity, and compassion are much more likely to produce enthusiastic action than sheer determination, fear or duty. 

When caregivers realize they aren’t trapped, that they absolutely can walk away, but they’ve chosen not to, it shows them that they’ve made a courageous and beautiful choice to make a difference for someone. They chose to do it because they are the best person for the job, not because someone forced them to do it. 

Getting up each day is easier with that kind of self-care.

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